Taming the Untamable

Omnisciently, they give me labels
Measure me by textbook tables
I am, they judge, a bit less than human
Just another disabled woman
Yes, I rock and roar in rage
From emotions tightly caged
I drag my body and my soul
Bury my mind in my own black hole
I gag on moods, greet with averted eye
Those people who about me sigh
With pity. Lie about I do
And get enraged by should and ought
Social acceptance dearly bought
Why must they need to judge and pass sentence
On one whose crime needs no repentance?
I see, hear and feel but must express
Ordinary sensations by some feared differentness
If reason says go and live
The way you're supposed to give
And take in normal company, then
For heaven's sake I say
There is another way
Whose piercing pain I know
But would still rather have it so
Than put myself behind a mask
To honor love and love honor is all I ask
I'm treated as a wooden face
Instead of lit by human grace
Tears I wish that they could taste
Instead of dry, unfeeling waste
I am lonely for another soul
Who sees, hears, feels my goal
Them or us we label thus
Instead of we and them together must
Open minds and hemmed in hearts
To dimly sensed other ways
Of mending our fragmented days.

For taming behaviour as loony as mine
I plead with you, go on take your time
And face the unfaceable
Name the unnameable
Open your doors to us, the unblameable
We agree that the job is formidable
To bring out of hiding what is unhidable
Though you were needed my need went unheeded
My garden grew ever more rank and unseeded
I begged you to hoe me and well to weed me
To water and watch and finally free me
From dark of night.
 

I grew up to light.
I threw off my label and now I was able
To wobbly behaviour at last make stable
Still though I roar, rock, wet and mess
Your caretaking love brings a new peacefulness.